Tired

It’s been a crazy week. Never a good idea to start a vacation off on 3 hours of sleep, but I never dreamed that it could be the most I got each night. I actually have no idea how much I am getting each night. It is a bit of a blur.

Between Blake’s coughing, me worrying about Blake being sick, and a 2 month old baby- well the sleep is a bit elusive.

Blake has been pretty sick. First strep, and then (we think) pneumonia, and then a case of croup (while still having the other two). I know Andy has been just as worried (having recently heard of an old friend that just lost her 12 year old to pneumonia). Even Austin, who in his pre-teen-ness thinks his little brothers are annoying, has asked on a multiple time a day basis, “is Blake going to be ok?”

One night I took Blake out to “sleep” on the deck, hoping the humidity might help ease his cough. He dosed on and off and we talked about the stars, about the ocean, the lightening way out over the ocean. I loved every minute of it, even if I didn’t sleep that night.

One night his coughing was so bad that no one slept- I don’t think Eva could even sleep through it. Oh wait, Cole did. He can sleep through anything.

One night I tried to get a little more sleep by bunking in Andy’s parents room with Eva. But of course my worry followed me there and I found myself getting up to go check on Blake and sit and watch his labored breathing.

Yesterday afternoon he turned a corner. He got chatty, his cough started to lessen. With it went the adrenaline that I have been living on the last 4 days. I walked by a mirror and caught sight of myself and the dark circles under my eyes and thought, “wow, I do not look I am on vacation.” I was exhausted.

But this is our last day at the beach, tomorrow we head back to Dallas with hopefully a trip to Houston to see my brother and family. We plan to make the most of the day- Blake’s first real beach day of feeling good. Caffeine will be my friend today.

Because more than anything else, I am just happy my guy is feeling better.