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Looking for answers….

Today was another bad day at school for Eva. I was pulled into the directors office and told that Eva was being defiant to the teachers, and when they tried to reprimand her she stuck her tongue out.

I know that’s nothing major, but her track record hasn’t been that great. She has pushed other kids, hit more than one teacher, and generally just can’t sit still to learn.

We are in the process of getting her tested for ADHD. I know she has it. I so want answers.

She doesn’t like behaving badly. And is very proud of herself when she has good days.

So when the director told me she felt it was just a “defiant stage” and that she thought she was doing it all on purpose I just shook my head no. She’s not doing it on purpose, it’s not a stage. We have been dealing with this forever.

I calmly walked her to the car trying not to cry. I asked her how her day was- and of course she lied and told me it was fine. She hates admitting she has had a bad day.

When I told her what they told me she started crying. And so did I.

This parenting gig- it’s not an easy road.

We came home and she quietly ate and then agreed to go lay down, no movies, no tv, no ipad.

She’s still sleeping.

I of course hop online. Reading about things to eliminate from her diet. Sugar, gluten, high fructose corn syrup…. We know sugar is a huge trigger for her and she very rarely gets it.

Gluten may be next on my list to try.

I have been reading an article with so many spot on statements

-Children with ADHD know from a young age that they’re different from other kids. “They see themselves as getting in more trouble, and in some cases may have more difficulty mastering academic work — often despite an above-average intellect. So instead of feeling stupid, their defense is to feel cool. They hone their oppositional attitude.”

-These children are most comfortable when they’re in the middle of a conflict. As soon as you begin arguing with them, you’re on their turf. They keep throwing out the bait, and their parents keep taking it

And for parents- some really great advice

- “Remain calm and friendly whenever you intervene. Oppositional kids have radar for adult hostility. If they pick up your anger, they’re going to match it.”

Eva totally knows which teachers are frustrated with her- and those are the ones that she always gives a hard time.

-Never lose sight of the fact that oppositional kids usually have a great deal to offer, once their behavior is under control. “Oppositional kids are also often quite engaging and bright,” “They tend to be optimistic and very much their own person, with their own way of looking at the world. Once you work through their defiance, there’s a lot there to like.”

That last sentence is so very true. Eva has such a great personality that is often overshadowed by her hyperactivity and negative behavior. She is very witty and funny and a super smart little girl.

I want everyone to see that side….

Elizabeth's - Aww I’m so sorry to read this. Parenting is so tough. I hope that things get better and I know they will. Hang in there!!!

Kathy t - Thanks for that. I’m sitting here trying to remain calm while dealing with my 10 yo son, who has ADHD. He’s had a really bad week, and it’s only Wednesday. The ‘remain calm’ strategy is next. UGH! Good luck with Eva. It will be fine.

Hannah - Oh honey. Today stinks. Neither of my kids have ADHD {although my mom always suspected I did} but I SO know what it’s like to have that battle with the teachers. Wanting them to see what is underneath…what they overlooking because they already have a label on your child. I’ve SO been that mom. I had to fight tooth and nail every day for Dmitry. It’s so hard. You are an awesome mom. Listen to that still small voice that is leading you, it’s there for a reason. You already know what to do.

PS: I totally want to drive to Ohio and smack whichever teacher is annoyed with her…even if they are totally justified. I still want to smack them. I want to cry at the thought of both of you crying in the car. Parenting is the stinkiest awesome job ever. Stinky…Awesome.

Gretchen P - We have been there, Robbie has it big time. All of the quotes you posted are Robbie to a T. We did the diet thing, behavior modification, and finally had to go the medication route. We were lucky to have Mrs. Moore at ES help to navigate all of this. If you need any help, let me know. I have a friend that teaches at Marburn Academy, she has great ADHD resources. There is a lot of information out there, and it can be hard to wade through all of it. There will be more tears, but I promise, there will be lots of laughs and smiles along the way.

Jen - We have walked the same road. We are STILL on that road with our daughter who is now 18! She has been medicated for 10 years and still has good days and bad days. Medication has worked wonders for her. I realize it’s not for everyone and I don’t want to debate that here. Just wanted to let you know that it worked for us and it CAN be helpful.

Your first sentence above describes our Sydney to a “T”, and she has perfected her oppositional attitude! I spend many days reminding myself that, if given the chance, she could RULE the world with her stubbornness and drive! (She just might be all alone while she does it. :-()

Hang in there! Hoping you find answers that work for Eva and your family! Hugs to you.

Meghan - I commented on your Instagram pic. Too but another thing that can trigger ADHD kids is dyes. I’ve tried to eliminate them from my sons diet. I agree about the sugar too if he gets into chocolate he can get absolutely nutty. Lastly making sure he gets his sleep is major. i try to keep him on his schedule. Good luck. It’s good that you are starting early. It only gets worse as they get older.

Pinning

What is inspiring you lately? I have been stuck with a sick house for a very long time. After Andy and I kicked it Blake got it really bad. He left the house for the first time in 8 days yesterday. I made him go to lacrosse practice- for the fresh air alone. I didn’t care if he just walked around and picked up balls- I wanted him to get some fresh air in his lungs. He ate an entire bag of cough drops while he was there. Poor dude.

After working over at our remodel all day yesterday, Austin came in last night and said he feels sick. So here we go again. Round 4.

I’m going a little crazy.

So let’s look at some pretty things shall we?

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There is pretty much nothing that I don’t like about that house.

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Pool house coolness

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I would also be happy in this little cottage- say on Tybee Island?

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These chairs? I think I need them.

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So ready for summer

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Perfect little bathroom

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I LOVE this

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Happy Place

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The color, the texture… perfect

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I’m addicted to Lisa Leonard

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Cozy up- nap time

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This light over my farm table

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The roof that is going on my front porch

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I think I need this shirt

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Eat-in

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Still debating the pool…..

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I love the sign I bought at the Country Living Fair so many years ago. It’s been in storage for over a year- can’t wait to get my stuff!!

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Want to sit out here with me?

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Tulips and lemons. Faves

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Best porch

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Basement

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I love this floor

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Barn door for my laundry room

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Ok I could go on and on but I have a boy that needs to get to lax and then my fave class at the gym at 3….

But I will leave with one more- See you soon ATX. It’s been a long time!

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Hannah - You and I have very similar taste in homes. I just love everything. I’m such a sucker for sliding barn doors and that color is just spot on…it’s my favorite this year.

Pam - The “little cottage” pic looks like my sisters neighborhood in Corona Del Mar, CA
It is full of those cottage type homes, so is Balboa Island.

Loved all the pics!

Laura H - Pretty pictures! Pinterest is sooo addicting!

joanna - Where did that daisy/water picture come from? I want that as a print for my bathroom!

Missing it

Sometimes I look back over my years of blogging and miss when I used to take more pictures and write more posts.

Life has a funny way of getting in the way of that sometimes.

This never ending winter has no doubt played into my lack of interest in my camera but I am so ready for the love affair to come back. I miss shooting. I miss editing. I miss it all.

We have had a hard run with a crud that just won’t go away. First Andy, then me, now Blake. And he has it pretty bad. He’s been sick since last Friday with no end in sight. I just want him to feel better.

We had a couple nice days this week and I chased Eva around with my small Samsung

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But she declared no pictures and got mad when I tried- so all I got is blur.

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In brighter news we now have a roof on our house.

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I’m worried that the house we are renting is going to go on the market soon and if it sells I’m not exactly sure what we would do….

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Come on house- we need you!!!

Susan - SOOOO glad to see that roof on. Now they can work inside and not worry about the weather!

hannah - I’m so there with you and the blog. Lately I just don’t want to do it…but then one of the kids will ask me to, or will want to read an old post and then I miss it. I could say a lot more but I won’t :)

Love that you have two stories and a roof! Yay!

I love the shots of Eva too, she’s the coolest :)

More Taquitos

This is the recipe we make most often and for some reason I have never posted it.

taquitos cr

Recipe and more pics found here.

Baked Creamy Chicken Taquitos
1/3 C (3 oz) cream cheese
1/4 C green salsa
1T fresh lime juice
1/2 t cumin
1 t chili powder
1/2 t onion powder
1/4 t granulated garlic, or garlic powder
3 T chopped cilantro
2 T sliced green onions
2 C shredded cooked chicken (for extra yumminess, use grilled taco chicken!)
1 C grated pepperjack cheesesmall corn tortillas (and actually, flour ones are really good as well)
kosher salt
cooking sprayHeat oven to 425. Line a baking sheet with foil and lightly coat with cooking spray.Heat cream cheese in the microwave for about 20-30 seconds so it’s soft and easy to stir. Add green salsa, lime juice, cumin, chili powder, onion powder and granulated garlic. Stir to combine and then add cilantro and green onions. Add chicken and cheese and combine well.You can prepare up to this step ahead of time. Just keep the mixture in the fridge.

Work with a few tortillas at a time and heat in the microwave until they are soft enough to roll without cracking. It helps to place them between damp paper towels. Usually 20-30 seconds will do it. If you find yours are cracking when you roll them or are coming unrolled right away, just try heating them longer and try the paper towel thing.

Place 2-3 T of chicken mixture on the lower third of a tortilla, keeping it about 1/2 inch from the edges. Roll up tortillas and place seam down on a baking sheet, not touching one another. Spray lightly with cooking spray, or lightly brush with olive oil and sprinkle lightly with kosher salt. Place pan in oven and bake for 15-20 minutes or until crisp and the ends start to get golden brown. Remove from oven and let cool slightly before serving.

I don’t dip in sour cream- I dip in guacamole. Also the kosher salt makes these things super yummy- don’t leave it off.

Hannah - I love Taquitos but have never made them at home…These look yummy!